of our man made differences

Most of us are born into religion not by choice, by what our parents practice. Very few of us ever consider anything else…its always painted like the worst thing ever. So we never bother to understand, we stand at our corners quiet with our one sided pool of information.

I met some friends over 3 years ago who I got to watch for basically one year. They have this way they live. They greet each other with kind words in the morning, have lunch together and even live together. They are a bit inseparable. I was a bit envious and I questioned what was this thing that made them so close. My friends are from India. Before, I would have been scared being anywhere near a shrine, but after meeting them, it didn’t scare me as much. I asked questions, what their holidays meant, why some were vegetarians…and even got into the habit of using words like namaste and bhai. My Indian friends taught me not to judge too quickly. They were kind to me and even kinder to each other. I was left questioning a lot of the information I previously had.And I understand now, holiness is in right action.

I fail to understand the kind of cruelty that comes with religious discrimination. Why killing is justified. Why one does not have a choice to chose their religion. Why death can be the solution for that change. Why women are treated like possessions, mutilated, not allowed to speak for themselves, even denied basic education. It beats the point if it is all for religion. I wish there was only one, maybe the millions of people who have lost their lives over it may still be with us.

We went wrong somewhere. Separating by skin color, by race, by religion. We went wrong and it might destroy us.

To simmer on:

I loved watching Kingdom of Heaven and this I had to rewind:

I love this quote the Gmoney says in the morning.

“I love you my brother whoever you are whether you worship in your church, kneel in your temple, or pray in your mosque.You and I are all children of one faith, for the diverse paths of religion are fingers of the loving hand of one Supreme Being, a hand extended to all, offering completeness of spirit to all, eager to receive all.” Kahlil Gibran

of 2013

Cant believe this year is almost over. What a year. This has been a year where my heart has been tested, when my dad fell sick and all walls came crumbling down. Yet my family was pulled out of that storm with no scars. Our maker loves us…we’re sure of that.

This has been the year where I have learnt so much on life issues. Learning to say no and yes. Learning to be honest even when it hurts. Learning to reach the skies past the doubts in others eyes. There was a time I used to think nothing could stop me. I need to get to that strong place again.

One thing am sure of, everything will be alright in the end.

Happy holidays and remember to spend this time with those close to heart.

Truly, Jem.

of awakening

In church a few years ago, the pastor preached about losing people. He asked us to note down a bunch of friends, and to check that list a few years down the line. This was a sermon about destructive lifestyles..what he didn’t mention is that the list still goes down as some people you consider friends stop being so.

I see growing up like a process of awakening. I must have been really “heavy” in my early 20s. Carrying all that weight of pretence, insecurity, loneliness, fake friends, bad relationships, fear of missing out….Eventually with time, you shed it off. If you accept to grow up. If you start to let your past lessons build you into this strong person. Your painful past kinda becomes your armor. There is something amazing about discovering and learning yourself. Nobody can make you feel different about you when you are OK with you. And that confidence, that drive to be something great, comes with “weight loss.” You start to be more honest about your feelings, knowing you risk people walking out the door. You start to tame your anger, knowing your limits. You apologise more and start to see things in other people’s eyes. You learn. And in the process become amazingly attractive. You know what you want in life, no apologies. You don’t wait by the phone for the cute guy you met to call, you have a life and things to do. And when he calls you wait for the excitement of a new relationship to fade off, you know the real stuff happens after that.  You realise the person you want to be and the people you want surrounding you, helping you be that person. You finally have the courage to tell your boss what you want. You start to plan checking off some of the things on your bucket list and the “weight” sheds off like free flowing water.

Friendships end/die for different reasons. And sometimes its just a time thing. You no longer want the same things. Which is fine. Sometimes we just get tired of pretending and smiling. I remember once feeling like screaming! I was smiling and laughing yet in my head WTF had a permanent residence. I was a fake. I couldn’t pull it off all my life. And sometimes friendships don’t die, but we go different ways. We are no longer bound by a crowd but we are strong individually. Pursuing different things. And its OK. Later we meet and chat about our experiences, say our goodbyes and move on only to meet years later.

Am I the strongest I have ever been?

Yes.

Does it get better?

I believe so. I am lighter, running faster and with a strong support system .

Weighed yourself recently?

of Gen Y

The generation of fast movers. A friend of mine had on his whatsapp status as “move fast, break things.” There is some sense to it. My mind has been thinking a lot about my generation of late 20 something and early 30 something. I am surrounded by ambitious young people. People who go to work, go to school, have a business on the side and still make time for investment clubs and such like things. They are full of energy. Millionaires in the 20s. They want more, they realize a day only has 24 hours but there are ready to work 90% of the time. Sleep is overrated in their universe.They are paying the price….but what is it for? I am in that place where a good vacation involves those close to my heart, sight seeing, hot weather, dancing, learning something new, doing something new….not how my vacations used to be. I used to go home more tired and hangovered wondering if I was on vacation or on a drinking marathon. Gen Y is also among all the hard work, drinking more, smoking more, sleeping less and picking up other high risk vices. Gen Y understands Wale’s song “BAD” like they wrote it. Stable relationships are not a priority. Interestingly there is a lot of insecurity in their eyes, almost like they know something is off and they will have to deal with it eventually.  Or maybe someone will finally see through all the hype…but of course this isn’t all of them…

So now what? Well I ask, what is all the hard work for? For money for now? Today?

Don’t you want to be 50? don’t you want grand kids? Don’t you want an empire? Rome wasn’t built in one day. Success might be what we measure it as, but I think success is in the quality of life. Not the intensity of it.You don’t want to spend most of your time in hospitals later when you could be enjoying your hard earned money on a saint something island in the Caribbean.

I salute my 20 something friends going into business. I salute those with a bigger vision, those inspiring others and influencing those around them and leaving a trail of future business leaders.  I salute my 30 something millionaires working hard and employing others and still showing the kind of humility that doesn’t come easy. I applaud those thinking of chasing their dreams. Go for it.

Here’s an article on Forbes on the Paradoxes of Gen y.

http://www.forbes.com/sites/lyndagratton/2013/06/06/the-three-paradoxes-of-generation-y/

This is Your Life

I Love it! For the single, passionate and curvy ones

This is Your Life.

via This is Your Life.

You don’t have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step.

I took my car out of town a few weeks ago. It was a big risk. I had never taken it out of town before and I wasn’t sure if we would make it. My mechanic said it was OK, I was unsure. But that didn’t mean I wasn’t going to take the risk. I knew no matter what happened, we would make it to where we were headed.

Halfway through the journey, my friend presses on the accelerator as we climb a hill. Next thing we know the radiator blew! It took us hours to be on the road again and we made it. I just believed everything will be alright in the end. And it was.

Life gives us options, we can choose to be optimistic or not. We can take the risk or not. In the end, you will either be comfortable doing something or regretting not doing it in the first place. We have a tendency to look at the cons in situations. “the car might stall, the dress might tear, he might break my heart…..” they start to sound like excuses. And fear feeds on those excuses.

I learnt something this year, I want to always be uncomfortable. The moment you don’t inspire more, the moment you get comfortable with where you are, then you never want more. You never work as hard. I never think as much when am comfortable. So I want to be uncomfortable, to be taking risks, to be pushing myself beyond what I can perceive. I remember wanting to see Cuba. From Kenya that’s a long way. I didn’t know how, but I wanted it.Somehow I got to see Cuba. Somehow things just worked out.

Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. “Take the first step in faith. You don’t have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step.”

You don’t have to see the whole way, just know where you are headed. Keep your eye on the prize and you will surely get there.

Jem

What do you desire?

A must watch. Its a waste to live your life not doing what you desire.

Its never too late

I was watching Brothers and Sisters last night and this quote was narrated at the end of the episode “Its never too late to be what you might have been.” I love it!

We like procrastinating and postponing things that we think can wait. And most of the time they can. “I will travel to Paris when I make my first million, I will settle down once I have a stable job….” we plan our lives around time and faith. Am not a very patient person. I am one of those who live by the words, life is too short so do it now. I obviously don’t get to do it as soon as I want but I try to do those things that I want as soon as I can. I look as life like we are all dying….and we just don’t know when we will leave this world. And even though we plan, sometimes we don’t get to see those things pass. So it brings me to this, that one thing or two that you really want to do, it might be climbing mt Kilimanjaro or taking a trip to Vegas, I suggest you do it. We always recover and learn. Pushing yourself out of your comfort zone open up your mind. Stop slaving 8 hours a day just to pay bills. Do something exciting with your life. Its never too late. You always wanted to be an artist, do it now! You have the power to change situations and be what you always wanted to be, experience what you always wanted. Make a wish, take a risk make a change.

 

with hope and gratitude-Jem

Transformation is not change

Food for thought

Quote of the week- Inspiration

Trust yourself. Create the kind of self that you will be happy to live with all your life. Make the most of yourself by fanning the tiny, inner sparks of possibility into flames of achievement.
– Golda Meir –

I love that quote. Nobody knows you better than yourself. You know what you want from this world which is a catalog to pick from. So why not choose the best? Be happy. Trust yourself and set sail in the direction of your desires and don’t let anyone stop you. Eyes on the prize. Don’t let the challenges overcome you or take you away from your goal. Remember as said constantly in The best exotic Marigold hotel; Everything will be alright in the end, if its not alright then its not the end. So go out there, do something that you have always wanted to do. Tomorrow exists in our imagination, its a matter of faith. So believe in you.

Am done preaching.